In addition, be sure to drink plenty of water each day. A good measure is to take your body weight in pounds and divide it in half: that’s how much water you should drink each day in ounces. Example: if you weigh 180 pounds, you’ll need to drink 90 ounces of water each day.
How often and how hard you exercise will depend on your own physical fitness and abilities; be sure to listen to your body and take it slow. If you are new to exercising and/or if you have any health concerns, consult your doctor to ensure that you follow an exercise routine that is safe for you.
Remember, you deserve to enjoy life; not simply endure it.
Allow yourself to have a day off when you’re really feeling low. If it’s really bad, give yourself a couple of days, but promise yourself that no matter how you feel after 3 days are up, you’ll get back to work/school and, if necessary, you’ll get help. Remember that even if you make mistakes, you’re still a whole, complete human being with inherent self-worth. [3] X Expert Source Amy WongLeadership & Transformational Coach Expert Interview. 30 April 2020.
Instead of pressuring yourself to be happy, acknowledge that it’s your goal, and then do the things that will help you achieve it — for example, being mindful, being kind to yourself, and exercising regularly. It may help you to make an action plan of how you want to be happier in life. Once you’ve written down your plan, it may be easier to focus on the steps you need to take to be happy, rather than on achieving the abstract feeling of happiness itself.
Negative emotions tend to happen when you start resisting reality. You can’t fix what you refuse to even think about. [4] X Expert Source Amy WongLeadership & Transformational Coach Expert Interview. 30 April 2020. Even if someone has done something hurtful to you, it does not benefit you to dwell too much on the pain. You can’t control their actions, and you can’t force them to make things better for you; you can only control your own actions and emotions. This may sound harsh, but it’s actually very positive. It means that you are in control of your own happiness. Don’t let someone else think they’re in control. Don’t give them that power!
Part of being positive is believing in yourself. Combat negative self-talk with positive affirmations. Example: instead of saying, “I am so stupid for failing that test”, say “I’ll need to study harder next time” or “I am disappointed that I didn’t pass that test; what can I do to ensure that I pass next time?” If you can’t find the good in something, avoid dwelling on the negativity. You’ll also benefit from avoiding spending time with people who feed your negativity.
It may help to keep a journal and list 3 good things that have happened each day, no matter how small they are. Example: “It started raining while I was running, and the cool rain on my hot skin felt so nice. ” Instead of dwelling on what you can’t do, make a list of things you can do: Can you walk? Talk? Breathe on your own? Can you see? Did you eat today and did you have access to clean water? Do you have a place to live? Can you read a good book? Can you appreciate a beautiful blue sky?
To live in the moment, the first step is to develop a nonjudgmental awareness of yourself and the world around you: try observing your thoughts without judgment. Do not dwell on those thoughts or rush to push them away; simply let them be. [7] X Research source When you walk to the store to get groceries, don’t focus on what you need to buy once you get there. Focus on how the ground feels beneath your feet; how the air feels against your skin; how it feels to breathe and walk; focus on the moment that you occupy right now. To increase your self-awareness, set 5 timers to go off throughout the day to remind you to evaluate your current emotions. By practicing naming your feelings, you’ll hopefully begin to have more control over them. [8] X Expert Source Amy WongLeadership & Transformational Coach Expert Interview. 30 April 2020.
One way in which you can build compassion toward others is through a “loving-kindness meditation”:[10] X Trustworthy Source Association for Psychological Science Nonprofit organization devoted promoting trustworthy research and education in the psychological sciences Go to source [11] X Research source Sit comfortably, breathe in and out from your heart center (your chest area), and think or say these phrases several times: “May I be free from inner and outer harm and danger. May I be safe and protected”; “May I be free of mental suffering or distress”; “May I be happy”; “May I be free of physical pain and suffering”; “May I be healthy and strong”; “May I be able to live in this world happily, peacefully, joyfully, with ease. ”[12] X Research source Next, still sitting comfortably and breathing from your chest, move your thoughts to someone you love unconditionally, and send them the same good thoughts. [13] X Research source After that, move on to a more neutral person, again reciting the words of loving-kindess, replacing the word “I” with their name. [14] X Research source Finally, move on to someone you have difficulty with, or dislike, and again repeat the words of loving-kindess. If you have difficulty doing this, start each phrase with “To the best of my ability I wish that you be…”[15] X Research source
Explore your own thoughts and emotions. When you have a thought, don’t just accept it as truth; be curious and ask yourself why you had that thought. You can do the same with others when they express ideas that are new to you or that you may not agree with. When you hear about something you don’t know, look it up online, or ask someone to explain it to you. Instead of always eating the same food at your favourite restaurant, try something new — better yet, try a new restaurant! You might even consider finding out how your favourite dishes are made, and then trying to make them for yourself at home.
Put aside 20 minutes of free time and sit comfortably in as calm and quiet a place as possible. Center your attention on something — for example, your breathing, an image, or even a mantra. When your mind wanders (and it will), don’t get angry; gently bring your focus back to the thing you chose — do this until the meditation is over. Gently close your meditation, slowly bringing your awareness back to where you are now.
One great way to gain some control over your day-to-day life is to block out your time in an hourly diary: Choose a diary that shows your entire week over a two-page spread. Beneath each day there should be squares representing at least 12 hours of your day: from the time you wake up to the time you get home from work/school. At the start of each week, block out how you will spend your time each day. Start with the things you must get done and then move down your list in order of priority. Example: 7:00-7:10 a. m. Wake up; 7:10-7:45 do yoga; 7:45-8:30 shower/get dressed, 8:30-9:00 make/eat breakfast; 9:00-9:45 travel to work; 9:45-10:00 settle in; 10:30 check emails; 10:30-12:30 data entry; 12:30-1:30 lunch; and so on. Note that things will not always go as planned, and that’s okay. What you block into your diary doesn’t have to be set in stone; it’s meant to be a guideline to help you gain some control over your time, and meet your goals.
Part of getting to know yourself could be keeping a daily journal. This will help you sort out your thoughts about things. Try to write in your journal every day - aim for three pages a day. Keep track of your feelings, likes and dislikes, successes etc.
Do things that make you laugh: see a funny movie, watch a comedy special on TV, hang out with funny people, play with a cat or dog, or do whatever it is that gets you laughing. Laughing and smiling, even when you don’t feel like it, can help boost your mood.
Read a book. Watch an inspiring film. Learn how to play an instrument, or take up painting or some other creative art. Go for a walk. Socialize with some friends. Join a club or sports team.
Allow yourself to be changeable and have good days and bad days, but always do your best, whatever it may be on a specific day.
Identify someone you’re angry with. Don’t start with someone with whom you have deep-seated issues; start with someone who will likely be easier to forgive, like that person who cut you off in traffic the other day, or someone who pushed past you in the hallway at school, if you’re still holding on to that. Get the anger out. Write your feelings down in a journal; discuss your feelings with friends, a therapist, or other supportive people. Work out whether you want to raise the issue with anyone. Picture the person in your mind, and ask yourself what they might have been dealing with on a person level, for them to have treated you that way. Putting yourself in their shoes will help you view them with more compassion, and may help you to forgive them. Note that this doesn’t make their actions okay. You do not have to put up with people treating you poorly. The goal of the exercise is merely to help you release your anger about the event, so that you can move on and feel happier in life.
If you’re feeling down, try smiling for at least 30 seconds to see if it helps boost your mood a little. You might even try smiling in the mirror and making silly faces — you might even get yourself laughing.
Cover your walls with things that inspire you — for example, pictures of places you’d like to visit, or people who inspire you or make you feel happy. Find your favourite photo of you and someone (or some people) you love. If it’s not already printed out, print it and frame it, and put it in a prominent place in your home.
Buy yourself that book you’ve been wanting to read. Take a few hours to sit in a comfy chair and read it while sipping your favourite tea. Have a bath in epsom salts and put on a nice moisturizer on afterward. Have a spa day.
If you can’t name 5, name as many as you can. Each day try to increase the number until you can list 10 or 20 things about yourself that you like. Almost no one will love everything about themselves; just try to like as much as you can. You are beautiful in your own unique way.
Try volunteering for a cause you believe in, even if it’s only for a few hours a month. Help a friend, relative, colleague, or neighbor with something you know they could use help with — for example, mowing the lawn, organizing their files, driving to the grocery store, packing up to move.
Allow yourself a few moments of distracted enjoyment as often as you can — no matter how bad you feel or how much you feel you may not deserve it.
